A Drop From Our Brain Into Our Heart: Core Self Reclamation
- Jody Allen, LCSW
- 2 days ago
- 7 min read
One Conscious Breath: Issue 16
One Conscious Breath: Issue 16
We don't cultivate our heart, we reveal it.
Before we begin, I invite you to take one conscious breath.
Feel the cool air as it enters your nostrils. Follow it as deeply as it goes into your body.
And then exhale. Out of your mouth. Slowly. Elongate the release as much as you can. And as you exhale, feel your shoulders drop. Feel your jaw soften. Feel your feet firmly on the floor.
Now pause.
Give yourself permission to simply be. In this silence. For just one conscious breath. And then gently meet whatever arises ~ whatever has been waiting underneath all the inner and outer noise ~ for a moment of stillness like this one.
And when you're ready ~ let's begin.
Last week, we sat in silence together.
I shared what becomes possible when we finally shift our awareness away from all of the noise in our lives long enough to hear what's beneath it, waiting to be heard. What I discovered, within my own quietude and space, after the fire burned through me, was my own true knowing. The revelation of my own heart.
I'd like to return back to that moment. It's important, because reconnecting with our hearts is only the beginning.
The next quest is how we listen to it and allow it to lead, once we have.
Throughout my decades-long search for deeper meaning, I've consumed hundreds, if not thousands, of books searching for the answer. I've taken countless trainings and courses, sat in hundreds of hours of therapy and supervision. Travelled to ashrams and spiritual retreats hoping to finally find the answer I was searching for.
But lo and behold, the answer was within me all along. It was just locked, behind barriers so fortified, not even I could access it. The irony is rich, isn't it? And yet, the simplest way to find it is to slow down. What we are ultimately searching for isn't just something we seek. It's seeking us too. And it's closer than we think. That word ~ think ~ is intentional, because we don't think our way to it. We feel it, by revealing and reconnecting with our hearts. All that is really required is a drop.
A drop from our brain into our heart.
We've been taught to prioritize our brain above all else. Anyone can consume information and store it in their brain. But it's the heart that synthesizes it. Animates it. Makes it come alive. Without the drop into the heart, information is known, but not lived. Our heart is where we come alive. We don't have to search the world over for the adventure that is going to stir our hearts. It's always waiting within, and accessible, one conscious breath at a time.
So, how do we begin to access our heart, after a lifetime spent disconnected from it?
First, we must understand we disconnected from our heart-knowing very early in life. It wasn't a conscious choice. It was survival. We needed to attach to our caregivers in order to survive. And we did. Our bodies and brains do whatever it takes to get our needs met when we are wholly dependent on someone else to meet them. They protected us and our tender hearts. It was necessary at the time. That's not the problem. It's brilliant, actually.
And this is where gratitude comes in: thank you for protecting us then, before we had the knowing and capacity to choose a different way.
The real tragedy is that disconnection continues even after we've grown up ~ long after we have more resources, more choice, and more experience to meet our own needs. We forget it was our heart all along that made us who we authentically are. Even though we can all consume the same information, it is our hearts that make us unique. It is our hearts that bring forth deeper insight and awareness. Wisdom. And it's essential to reclaim our connection to it.
What kept us safe when we were little keeps us caged, disconnected and stuck as adults. It is this illusion of safety, not the truth of it, that keeps us disconnected from trusting ourselves, trusting our own true knowing.
This is where courage is necessary ~ any time we do something new and different, it's required. I'm asking you to do something that may go against a way of being that kept you feeling safe when you were small. I assure you, it was brilliant and necessary then. But now, it's outdated. And what helped you feel safe then may be keeping you disconnected from the very thing that will set you free now.
And it can come one conscious breath at a time. Slowly and steadily. Growing in strength and trust that a new way of living, a new way of connecting, a new way of being is possible. Our soft spot, our hearts, are at the core of us all. More than cultivating it, we only have to reveal it.
As Michelangelo revealed David.
We, too, reveal our hearts when we begin to let go of the strategies that were built early on in service of our survival.
So, what does it actually mean, what am I actually asking you to do, to reveal your heart? Rather than a single cathartic breakthrough or an entire dismantling of everything you have known and lived thus far, this revelation is softer, more intentional. One conscious choice and breath at a time.
Instead of hyper-managing who we are expected to be at any given moment, we simply show up as we authentically are. The different masks come off ~ the performing, the people-pleasing, the self-abandonment. The masks we may not even know we are still wearing. We needed them when we were small. But now, they take up space and make it more difficult to move with flexibility, flow and ease. And, honestly, it's exhausting to keep performing ~ editing who we are depending on the role we are playing at any given moment.
It takes something real to meet ourselves, our hearts, to reveal and reclaim them. And then allowing others to see this unedited version of us. Whether they like it or not. Whether they stay or not. Instead of working to get people to like us or to stay. It's trusting that when we are living authentically, the right ones will come. And whether they stay or not isn't dependent on us performing. It's dependent on us staying in connection with our own hearts. Knowing and trusting, either way, when we are living connected to our heart, we will be okay.
Because here's what's waiting for you, once a mask comes off, even for just one breath.
Not a new, improved or finished version of yourself. What's waiting for you ~ ever so patient and faithful ~ underneath every strategy that was built to survive, is you. The whole, fully resourced, authentic you.
It feels like a wetsuit finally coming off after being in the ocean. We didn't even know how much we couldn't feel ourselves until the protective layering was gone. The warmth of the sun actually touching our skin. A full breath, instead of a constricted one. Our own movement becomes flexible, instead of fixed and managed.
When we reconnect with our hearts, we live more authentically. And no matter what happens next ~ we feel more in alignment, more connected, more alive within. We understand what we have control over and what we don't. Life doesn't actually get any easier. How we show up for it does.
This will not happen all at once. It happens the way Michelangelo's work happened ~ one small, deliberate choice at a time to remove what is no longer necessary. Staying for one more moment with a sensation rising in your body, instead of bracing. Saying what you feel instead of keeping it hidden. A little more truth. A little more authenticity. A little more vulnerability. Revealed. Moment by moment, breath by breath.
I promise you: you have more knowledge, awareness and inner resources now than you've ever had before. And if you're reading this, you've survived. And more than that ~ you deserve to thrive. The world needs you. All of you ~ brain and heart. In coherence. This alignment will allow you to move through life with more flexibility, more ease, and more grace. Not only for yourself but for others and the world.
Confusion often lives in the gap between what our brain tells us and what our heart knows to be true. When we bring those two forces together, align them, the tension and confusion begins to cede to clarity. We build the capacity to live more in flexibility and flow. One conscious breath at a time.
The way back to our heart is simpler than we think. We don't need more analysis. Not even one more book. I realize the irony of me offering a book, and I still believe it's true. All we need is the willingness to be curious enough, and willing enough, to let go of what's familiar and return to what's true. What feels true. Simple. Heart-knowing. Courageous. Love.
This drop is not another technique. It's a homecoming, a return, you already know how to make. It's inherent. It's not a doing. But a return to simply being.
You've been making it, in fact, since the first conscious breath of this newsletter.
A Practice for This Week
At some point today, notice a moment when you're caught in your head ~ analyzing, deciding, replaying.
Pause. Place a hand over your heart.
Take one conscious breath, and let your attention drop ~ just a bit, just a breath's worth ~ from your brain into your chest.
You don't need an answer to arrive. You're not trying to think your way into your heart.
Just notice what's already there, waiting, once you stop trying to figure it out and simply feel it instead.
That's the drop.
With love and One Conscious Breath,
Jody
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