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What if we could rise above conflict? What if we are looking at ourselves, each other and the world from the wrong perspective? I don't mean "wrong" in a punitive, pejorative way. I mean, wrong in a limited way. Imagine a diamond, with many facets. We can choose to look at any one of them and see the jewel from a different perspective. However, when we are in conflict, and our autonomic nervous system is in a state of fight or flight (or shut down), we have limited ability to

Ruptures are a natural part of relationships -- they happen as we are learning one another. And let's be honest, we are constantly learning one another, because each of us brings our own life history (and future hopes and fears) to the present moment. Not to mention our early childhood attachment patterns. And we are always growing and evolving. I would be surprised if there were no moments of miscommunication, misunderstanding, or misalignment in a relationship. If they don’

Are you running away from something? Or are you running toward something? I often gauge if I am moving through life situations based on...

Do you know the difference between emotionality and adaptive emotions? Emotionality keeps us stuck in feelings of overwhelm, while...

We don't love others the way they need to be loved. We love others the way we need to be loved. I'm sure this is not a revolutionary...

What keeps us disconnected from our heart? We've been conditioned to prioritize our brain above all else. And yet, it is our heart that...

What if I tell you we all have it backwards? Upside down? Living our lives from the perspective of doing instead of being . We do , in...

Our autonomic nervous system (ANS) operates as our internal barometer constantly searching for cues of safety and threat - rising and...

There is so much talk about triggers lately. People getting triggered by seemingly everything. When did triggers become a bad thing? No...

I often hear that change is difficult. What happens within you when I write, change isn't difficult, but it is different ? Change implies...

I have been thinking a lot about fear lately. Funny thing fear is, isn't it? It is quite powerful - stops us from being, doing, engaging,...

How do we break through the scab of wounds that feel like they are a second skin? So familiar, perhaps, they feel primary to who we are....

When I share this with clients they are often confronted with a shift in perspective. From looking outwardly for others to meet and...

As I feel into Billy Joel’s reemergence into our collective consciousness, I am reminded that his anthem, “Turn the Lights Back On”, is a...

In a therapeutic relationship, the role of the therapist is to help liberate the client. And in doing so, the therapist also becomes...

Living in California, I am acutely aware of what it feels like to wear a wetsuit in the Pacific Ocean. It protects me from the bitter...

We are all searching for answers. We are inundated with information – at our very fingertips, every second of the day. And I wonder, has...

Were the lockdowns at the beginning of the SARS2 pandemic to blame for our increased feelings of loneliness and isolation? A collective,...

One of the biggest hurdles to healing I see in my practice is people not liking themselves. The negative self-talk, criticism and...